Friday, March 2, 2012

NO to New Cheerios

I really wanted to like them.

I mean I've always respected Cheerios' wholesome image, and I try and buy at least one box a month. I like their whole grains. I do. And they taste pretty good. Overall.

And so I think I probably let out a little squeak when I, on cereal isle patrol, spotted them. 

Peanut butter. Chocolate. Cheerios.

With trembling fingers, I pulled them off the shelf and let the box fall like a lover from a cliff into my cart. Even my son will eat these, I muttered to myself.

But then I got them home.

Hmm. What word will best describe them? 

Dull? Weak? Bland? Cardboard? Flavorless?  Wimpy?

Pick one. They all work. 

And what a disappointment! The chocolate ones, which my son and I both tried last (we held hope till the end!), even had that shiny coating like the really delicious chocolate cereals have -- you know what I mean -- the one that makes the milk all chocolately. 

But noooooooo - nooo, cruel world!

The ugly, ugly truth, is that that chocolately sheen was painted on just to raise your hopes

Heartbroken, we threw both boxes in the trash. 

General Mills, if you read lowly authors' blogs, I beseech you to rethink your recipes. Raising my hopes just to dash them so cruelly means that next time I have to select my pick for breakfast, I may just pass your section by.

For the rest of you, I can't recommend these two flavors for anybody. I honestly cannot think of one demographic to whom these would seem attractive.

No - wait. Masochists - yeah - - masochists might like 'em.

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